An Introvert’s Strange Guide to Making Friends

Well certainly this is not a movie. At least I don’t think it is. But if there is one by that title please let me know so that I can check it out. It’s just a glimpse into my life.

One of my unspoken resolutions for this year is to make new friends.

In particular 4 new friends. Don’t ask if there is any significance to the number. I just sat and thought it would be nice to make a new friend. It’s silly how I decided it was something I would do intentionally. I just sat down at the end of last year and realised that the last new person in my circles was over three years old.

And that is not a problem. (Especially considering last year was mostly a miss on a number of levels).

I’m down for close friends, the ones that span decades and lifetimes. I’m also not overly obsessed with having a large group of friends, a small authentic tribe will do.

Well, then the 4 new ones?! πŸ˜…. Aside from the fact that it is always nice to make a new friend? I just wanted a new pair of eyes through which to glimpse the world. Everyone comes with a viewpoint that’s interesting and I think I want to encounter that, challenge my little bubble.

Anyway, conversation does not, DOES NOT, come easy to me. Like that initial interaction. And I’m not saying this as an excuse. It’s something I consciously try to work on but you can’t really teach an old dog new tricks (not that I’m that old, or a dog) but breaking out of my normal is proving to be quite the hurdle.

But I’ve tried to get out of my comfort zone. Being home, the chances of meeting people are really slim. Obviously, πŸ™„. And I thought I would go out. Because aside from the health regulations in place, I also work from home. And I wouldn’t have it any other way, especially in this time. So if I’m going to meet anyone, I have to make the conscious effort to move out. There is not much left to chance or simple bumpings into people.

First try, live band. πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚ I did the live band – loved it. Got there and naturally put my guard up; picked up my phone, and plugged in my earphones (I promise you this was before the music) and didn’t dare to make eye contact with anyone. Sure enough, everyone who came in after, came with a companion. What’s most unbelievable…and a little annoying…about that is that once I was done and home, I thought up about a thousand ways I could have navigated my way into at least one conversation.

In stretching my events; I went for an entrepreneur breakfast. Great time to talk to like- minded people because that’s always a plus in making friends – find something in common. And no, I’m not truly an entrepreneur but I have found I do enjoy talking moneyπŸ€‘πŸ€‘πŸ€‘πŸ€‘. Money! Money! Money, show me the money. But I got there and position myself, paid too much attention I forgot to chat up to the people around me and once the event was done, I tried to loiter but didn’t make it beyond five minutes and I was out the door, having hardly talked to anyone.

Try 3 (and I’m sure at this point you already know how it is going to go). I make it to the cinema, because I love movies but I especially love movies on the big screen. The idea behind the cinema is even sillier. I wrote a story about a friendship that blossomed from a cinema. Mushy mushy stuff that you can read on Reedsy. Why I had the confidence to let fiction be my guide is purely beyond me. But I went anyway and did everything I had coached myself into not doing.

And another event…do you even want to hear about itπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚? I’ve been on that sought of spiral. And the resolution mocks me. We are coming to a third of the year done and there’s not even one – not even a potential. I just wish friends would make me.

All Photos taken from Unsplash

The latest in these sad escapades was yesterday. Except that it didn’t end up as sad as the rest. I went out and we were forced into a group to come up with something. In my mind, I was like ‘yay, potential friends’. Yep, I’m at that point where I’m like the ‘friend monster’. But it was a nice group. We laughed and did the work. And then that tricky bit, once everything is done? I didn’t flee the scene (thank you, thank you) and got a few contacts. Progress!!! Let’s see how well we all follow upπŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚πŸ˜‚

OK. Those are my friend hustles. But if you don’t mind sharing I’d like to hear one of the strangest friend origin you have; either you went through it or had about it. Or just how you met your friends. Doesn’t have to be wild.

5 thoughts on “An Introvert’s Strange Guide to Making Friends

    1. That’s quite the avenue! Nice. I always hear about social media friendships and would like that. But I’m also not that active online. Strangest for me so far is one I met at a job interview.


      1. That’s the part that freezes me a bit. What if I just like your online persona and real life is so differentπŸ€¦πŸΏβ€β™€οΈ. Clearly I just over think these things for no good reason.


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